This Politician From Oregon Who Was Going To Orgies With His Wife Is The Most Electable Candidate I’ve Ever Heard Of

A top candidate in the Republican primary for Oregon governor has admitted that he and his wife had explored a swinging lifestyle before deciding that swapping partners wasn’t for them, according to a report.

Stan Pulliam, 40, told the Willamette Week that he and his wife of 12 years, MacKensey, had “explored relationships, mutual relationships with other couples, for a brief period of time before ultimately deciding that it wasn’t for us.”

Pulliam, the mayor of his hometown of Sandy, fessed up to the outlet after a 2016 screenshot from a page titled “Swinger Facebook Group PDX” made its rounds across the state’s political circles.

“Hi Everyone! MacKensey and I are excited to be added to your little community. Some of you we have already had the pleasure to meet and we look forward to getting to know the rest of you!” he wrote in the group, which had 536 members at the time, the Willamette Week reported Thursday.

In an interview last week with the newspaper, Pulliam declined to reveal when the “mutual relationships” began or ended, but said the couple’s participation ended well before he began running for the state’s top office.

Pulliam told the newspaper that his past sexual activity is consistent with his campaign values.

“In Oregon, we really cherish values of individuality and liberty,” Pulliam said.

“The decisions that we made were for MacKensey and I to make in the privacy of our own homes. We’re certainly not asking anybody to participate or practice or do any of the things that we have decided to do in the past,” he said.

“But we’re also certainly not ashamed of decisions that we’ve made in the past either, as they’ve made us stronger,” the candidate added.

This should be the biggest nothing burger ever. In fact, finding out that this guy and his wife were banging all over the goddamn place only makes him more electable in my eyes

I remember one of my first VHS porns ever was a feature called “Backseat Driver”, and there was a scene where three chicks were lined up bent over on a couch with their asses facing this dude and I’ll be damned if he didn’t go down the line rimming each one of them before the penetration began. It was a goddamn inspiration and the kind of thing that the Pulliams would probably be into.

Look, as an electorate we need to ask ourselves, when the shit hits the fan who do you want representing you? Some pussy who only does it under the covers with the lights off or a savage who goes face deep in some chick’s asshole while his wife tongues his nutsack? For me it’s a no brainer, but I guess there are just some people out there who view an all night, all holes filled fuckfest as some kind of scandalous endeavor, and because of that this guy feels the need to explain himself. Well I say shame on society.

Stan Pulliam, dick swinging champion of sexual freedom that he is, should not have to make milk toasty, ‘I did not inhale’ statements like this one:

In an interview last week with the newspaper, Pulliam declined to reveal when the “mutual relationships” began or ended, but said the couple’s participation ended well before he began running for the state’s top office.

He should be out there front and center waving the flag for people who love to fuck and declaring that his first act in office will be to hold an inaugural gang bang in the governor’s mansion.

It’s 2022, everyone likes to cum, even conservatives. Sure, there was a time not too long ago when conservatism was about dressing like Mr Rodgers and getting minorities out of town by sundown, but modern conservatism is about owning an assault rifle, smoking weed, and banging your wife in a room full of strangers. “We’ve come a long way baby!”

Remember that chick who was killed during the Capitol riot — the Q Anon, Air Force, MAGA chick? She was in a throuple with another woman and some tatted up dude with a beard.

How about Marjorie Taylor Greene? Huge MAGA chick! She was allegedly banging half the staff at her gym, including one guy who also worked as a tantric sex guru and sword fighting instructor.

Jerry Falwell Jr and his wife certainly lean to the right in their politics, but you know what else they like to do? Bring in oily young pool boys for cuckhold sessions in Miami hotels.

The point is, this is not your grandmother’s Republican party…unless of course your grandmother liked to ride a sybian until she squirted on a couch full of guys in opera masks.

Personally, if I was a Republican strategist I’d be telling these guys to get out there and shoot as many loads as possible. Just be sure to pull out, that way in addition to being sexually liberated you can maintain your pro-life stance and continue to appeal to single issue voters in flyover country; let em know you can be both pro life and pro load.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this:
search previous next tag category expand menu location phone mail time cart zoom edit close